Why does he think im cheating

The real problem started a few weeks ago when he mentioned he's been seeing this other girl. I knew about her before, but the way he talked about her, coupled with flirting and sexting me, heavily implied that they were just as serious as we were which is not at all and that what we were doing was OK.

We've already established that we don't care about hooking up with other people. However, he later told me that they were more serious and there were feelings there that he had "avoided" with me.

When I asked if frequently hooking up with me meant cheating on this other girl, he said it was a gray area that he didn't want to bring up with her. He also said that she has no idea about me and made it seem as if she would be angry if she found out, but I also don't think it's my place to tell her about us. We've continued hooking up since that conversation, but I'm starting to feel pretty guilty every time I do it — technically they're not together, apparently haven't discussed being exclusive, and have decided not to officially date Am I a bad person for wanting this to continue and letting it happen, even if I'm the side chick?

What should I do? First, let's talk about this dude you're boning: He's cheating. When a guy says there's a "gray area," he always and forever means that the other woman would be pissed.

And if she would be pissed , then he knows that she's assuming monogamy. And if he knows that she's assuming he's not sleeping with anyone, sleeping with you is cheating. Ergo: He's cheating. Also, you're assuming that this guy — who's sneaking around on another woman — is being completely honest with you.

Is he really telling you the truth about what he's told her? If he's lying to her, how are you so sure that he's telling you the truth? You should assume that he's cheating on this woman, knowing that it would hurt her, and that you likely don't have the full story. So where does that leave you? This doesn't make you a "bad person. This guy's not necessarily a bad guy, but he is doing a bad thing: He's cheating.

So you've got to ask yourself: If you're looking for a casual relationship, can't you find someone who's not lying and cheating on some other girl? Wouldn't you rather have a casual situation with less drama? Wouldn't you rather not be caught up in this mess?

Because this doesn't seem that casual to me. It sounds stressful. Casual flings always run their course. Prachi Gangwani is a Delhi-based writer and content creator. Currently, Gangwani adorns two hats: She runs Keeping Zen yep, she's the founder of this fabulous magazine , which delves into relationships, sex and gender, and wellness. After studying psychology and practicing as a family and couples counselor for two years, Gangwani switched to a full-time writing career.

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We earn a small commission when you purchase an item by clicking on an Amazon link on our website. They are possessive Possessiveness comes from a desire to control your partner. There has been some change in your behaviour recently Relationship coach Melinda Carver told Bustle in an interview that a sudden change in your lifestyle or behaviour could be misinterpreted as a sign of cheating.

You spend too much time glued to the phone Ugh! Tags relationship advice relationship blogs relationship psychology.

What's Your Reaction? If you've been more private than whatever is normal for you, you have to realize how that might be read and explain what's going on. Once you deal with the behavioral issues, it's time to get to the root of the problem. Are they just feeling insecure and irrational or do they really think you're cheating? It can happen to the best of us. I have certainly felt things emotionally that I knew, logically, weren't true.

So you need to find out if your partner thinks you are actually cheating or if they're having illogical fears because of other issues. Maybe something is going on in their life or in your relationship that's making them feel neglected or angry. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. So, He is really cheating on me.. And he wants me not to stress myself and him, and take everything easy.

Just about everything in this list. Guess what I have to discern now is if my insecurities are creating phantoms or is my instinct desperately trying to open my eyes? Your email address will not be published.

Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. Life is Messy. And without support, many lose hope that things will ever get better.